


your bones, they lay at rest

by blacksatinpointeshoes



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Afterlife, Dreamsharing, F/F, Gen, Grizzop is mentioned, Hugs, it’s soft? Ish?, s4 spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-08 00:07:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21226511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blacksatinpointeshoes/pseuds/blacksatinpointeshoes
Summary: Azu doesn’t sleep well, anymore.Written for Day Two of Rusty Quill Gaming Girls Week!!





	your bones, they lay at rest

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY RQGG WEEK!! WHAT IF: GIRLS GOT NICE THINGS, KIND OF. YEEEAH. enjoy!!

Step one is dragging herself out of bed. Well, no. Usually there isn’t a bed for Azu to drag herself out of, not lately. It’s more ‘pulling herself off the floor’ or ‘jolt upright to Hamid screaming himself awake’ or something. 

Actually, scratch that. Step one is falling asleep— no, step one is deciding to go to sleep. Step one is deciding to go to sleep, and then maybe,  _ maybe,  _ the rest will fall into place. 

Azu manages to fall asleep tonight, through guilt and a hazy mind and an uncomfortable surface to lie upon. She shuts her eyes and prays for rest and manages, somehow, to drift off into uneasy darkness. It’s not that she doesn’t expect the nightmares, not that she hasn't grown to brace against them instead of flinch away, it’s just that this is never pleasant, and the anticipation is almost worse than the thing itself. 

Azu manages to fall asleep tonight, and is immediately jolted into lucidity when she isn’t thrust into hell. Instead, there’s something — something  _ light  _ surrounding her, something warm and gentle, something like a summer breeze, with the rustle of birdsong nearby, and— 

There’s a familiar  _ swick _ and the silver of a gleaming knife and the birdsong stops. “Sorry,” says Sasha, stepping out from behind a tree. “Grizzop says I don’t have much time.” 

Azu stares. “S- _ Sasha?”  _

“Hi,” says Sasha, massaging the small, dashed scar on her cheek. It wasn’t there when Azu last saw her— hell, the grey in her hair wasn’t there when Azu last saw her, nor the wrinkles of age crowding her eyes and forehead. “Sorry, this must be a bit of a shock, huh? Forgot about that.” 

There is a ripple of dappled light and then Sasha’s form flickers; when Azu blinks, there is her friend: young and scarred in the ways that she knows, in the ways that she loves, in the ways that she has caught and held over and over and bandaged and fretted over— this is Sasha as Azu last saw her, awkward and kind, and a memory, now. 

Azu can only manage a startled, “I— I don’t understand—”

Sasha sits down, splays her legs across the ground, pats the spot next to her. “C’mere,” she says with a tiny smile, and Azu obliges, unsteadily. 

“How are you  _ here?”  _ Azu asks, breathless, instead of hugging her, instead of wrapping Sasha up in her arms, and gods, she  _ knows  _ it’s a dream but she’ll take anything. This feels so real it’s unholy. 

“Well—” Sasha dithers for a moment, playing with a knife — an ice dagger, Azu realises, just like the one she lost — and then sighs. “‘m not, Azu. You’re dreaming, and I’m— dead.” 

On impulse, Azu says, “Don’t say that. We’re  _ going  _ to find you and bring you home.”

Sasha smiles gently, sadly. It looks out of place on the face of a woman so used to suffering. Sasha smiled recklessly or not at all. “No, you’re not,” she says, putting a hand on Azu’s knee. “But ‘s okay. We’re okay. Well— Grizzop’s not really okay for a bit, but we both end up okay, which is what counts.” 

“By ‘okay’ you mean ‘dead,’” Azu says slowly, hollow, and Sasha shrugs. 

“I guess.” 

“How can you— how can  _ this  _ be  _ okay?”  _ Azu asks, tears springing to her eyes, and she struggles to wipe them away. “How is it okay that you died somewhere— somewhere  _ alone,  _ without  _ us,  _ without  _ anyone?  _ How is that okay?” 

Sasha freezes up for a moment in the way that Azu is used to her freezing up when anyone is emotional in her vicinity. But then Sasha sighs, puts a hand on Azu’s shoulder, and squeezes. “Ancient Rome.” 

“What?” 

“We died in Ancient Rome,” Sasha says, clearing her throat and looking down. “Grizzop ‘n me both. When it got ruined. Well— he died when it got ruined, I died about— sixty years later? Feels like nothin’ up here. Anyway. We got sent back in time, and it was awful, and there were the dragons ‘n everything, and I’ll admit it, I was pretty torn up about Grizzop ‘n all, but— I got out. Meritocrats scorched the place and I got out with this prick named Cicero — shouldn’t be that rude about him, he was a good friend, good man, you woulda liked him— anyway, I carried him on my back through the sewers and started the Harlequins. Led that for about fifty years, and then I died. Old age. Who woulda thought, right? Me, dying of old age! I was like, eighty years old, Azu. It was okay.” 

Sasha puffs air at her bangs, which have fallen into her face, and Azu buries her head in her hands and starts sobbing. “Ah, fuck,” says Sasha gently, patting Azu atop her stubbled head. “Look, I don’t have much time left to be in your dream, but if you want, we can just— walk around? Heard that clears the mind, or something.” 

Azu scrubs furiously at her face and takes a deep breath. “No. No,” she says, drinking in the sight of Sasha’s eyes, of every second she has left. “I— where  _ are  _ you? How did you get here?” 

Sasha spreads her arms to the forest around them. “Welcome to the Eternal Hunt. We’re in Artemis’ domain, Azu.” Before Azu has time to be properly awed, Sasha stammers,  _ “Well—  _ I’m in Artemis’ domain. You’re in— Japan? I think. Can’t get a perfect read, you know, ‘specially since I’m not the one controlling it. Anyway, there’s some godly magic involved, but you’ve got the afterlife in your head, and that’s got… me.” 

“Will I be able to see you again?” Azu asks, almost desperate, and Sasha shifts away. 

“I don’t know. I— I’m not really supposed to be here in the first place? But I’m good at bein’ slippery, and Grizzop ‘n I could both tell you were stressed out, it was so loud, so— maybe, I guess,” she replies, with a shrug that does not even bother to seem careless. “Hope so.” 

“Sasha, I miss you,” Azu says, her words choking off in her throat. “I— we were all supposed to come back  _ together.  _ We were all supposed to be okay. We— I wanted— I just  _ wished—” _

“I know,” Sasha says wistfully, her eyes sad. “Me too.” All at once her face goes slack, head cocked to the side, listening. And all at once her longing expression becomes mournful and she stands, and Azu follows her lead. “Grizzop says I’ve got to go,” Sasha explains, tucking her ice dagger into her trousers. 

“Oh.” 

“Sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault.” 

Sasha fiddles with her fingers for a moment, then says, “Look, Azu, can I—” at the same time as Azu asks rushedly, “Is it alright if I—”

“No, you go first,” Azu says, smiling. 

Deep breath. “Can I give you a hug?” 

“That was my question!” 

“So it’s a yes?” Sasha asks, a little bashful, a little confused, all too fond. 

“Of  _ course  _ it’s a yes,” Azu says, and before she can finish the last syllable, Sasha has thrown her arms around Azu’s neck and is dangling there, her feet almost ten inches off the ground, burying her face into Azu’s chest. Before she’s finished the last syllable, Azu is already reaching up to catch her Sasha, to hold her fast, to tie her down. 

The spirit of the rogue dissolves in her arms, and Azu wakes up, blearily, her vision unfocused and her chest warm. 

She— oh.

Just a dream. Right. 

Azu sits up, and pushes the makeshift blankets off of her legs, and frowns at the sound of a  _ clang  _ as they hit the ground. That’s not right, they’re blankets. Cautiously, Azu picks up her quilt, shakes it out, and— there.  _ There.  _

An ice dagger. Gleaming adamantine. Perfect quality. 

Azu has never received a kinder gift. 

**Author's Note:**

> aaaas always I can be found on tumblr @thoughtsbubble, on twitter @ucbamba, and currently on a train to nowhere! comments and kudos are always deeply appreciated. thank you for reading!


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